The AMAZING Molly Jean

Okay so let me start with my little, here's to the woman who is the godmother of my babies story. I have touched on some of her remarkable characteristics once or twice, but this post is all for her.

Molly is one of those women who works her tail off, makes all her friends feel special and then for those of us who let her totally in, she changes your world. I am sitting here right now thinking of my life 5 short years ago, yes I knew my husband and I knew my family and I was happy. Now I look at all I have and I just want to cry, okay let me be honest, I do cry. How is it that I have all these people who I love and who love me back? Okay back to Miss Molly...

She has taught me that it's okay to have someone to vent to, daily, hourly, whenever you need it and to be that person to your friend in return. Before Molly Jean, I thought it was normal for a person to keep all your dark secrets and all your crying for your spouse? Man was I wrong, if you get the wonderful opportunity to have a friend who listen to you unconditionally and then not kill your husband even though he was pretty stupid that day or tell you to leave him, you are a lucky woman.

Oh don't let me forget, Molly also taught me to stick up for me once in a while, who knew? Don't get me wrong, I'm selfish and think about myself way too much, but in certain situations you need to listen to your heart and go with "what YOU want." Okay so back to her, she works 6 days a week, and still finds time to listen to me complain. Her husband is going to kill me if I don't start only talking about "great pregnancy things" otherwise she will be waiting even longer to have a few of her own...he will be thrilled to know, yep week 14.5 RULES and now that I have energy again, I will make sure and tell Molly all about the good pregnancy things too.

She will be this mom who invites her son/daughter's entire class over after school for snacks and games, and the kids will want to go. Her children will be smart, gorgeous and will treat each and every human being with the utmost respect. She is going to go to every basketball game, ballet, musical, & math competition. Her children will not hide their faces when their mom walks in, but run up and hug her because they knew she would be there, Molly is always there when you need her. Not too mention, she is a stunning woman and who wouldn't be proud to have her walk in to see you...

I would give this woman the world, the funny thing is, she never asks for anything. My wish is for everyone to be lucky enough to have a person in their life like I do, Molly is one of a kind and I hope she has a small idea of how much she means to me.

Freezing in Iowa....

So it's freezing and icy and to all who know me, I suck in bad weather any way....So I decided to work from home today. This brings up an interesting story for me, why is my boss laying me off now? It's strange how you can do all the crap work for 3 years and have no problems. No problems making coffee, running errands, doing all these things you would have thought your college degree made you exempt from and then when you need a little loyalty back, TA DA you get laid off.

Here's the weirdest part, I'm going to be okay, my babies are going to be okay and yes even though he is working 60 hours a week in case, my husband is going to be okay. I just want to scream and yell and stand up for myself and instead, I will move on. I have babies now, who needs a crappy job? Okay I need a crappy job, I need to buy diapers and cribs and clothes and well I'm sure grandma and family will cover toys :), but you get what I'm saying.

I will look for a job and that is that, great timing boss man, I'm so glad I respected you enough to tell you before I told my family and respected you enough to give you a head's up so you could let me go.

Enough about that, let's talk about the blessing that I have been given. Here I am 34 years old and about to have TWO babies, seriously. How in the world did I get to be the luckiest woman on the planet? I have an amazing husband who let's me put my cold feet on him and now we are having two little miracles!!! I can't stop smiling now that I'm not sick everyday. I have a very best friend who has been so supportive and my rock as always, a twin of my own (Gemini Mandy Belly) who is going through this whole thing with me in warmer weather, even though she is 8 weeks ahead and she didn't get morning sickness :).  We have even more amazing friends who will find out Friday that we are expecting and it's been all I can do to keep this fantastic secret!!!! Thank goodness my husband is a rock, I would have told them all way before now :)

Oh and I want to thank my family for letting me call them and freak out about silly things so they can tell me for the first time, "you are normal." I love them and I am so thankful, especially now when people are complaining about the holidays and the stresses of seeing everyone and surviving, I am thankful. We are a crazy fun family who would drop everything and get to the person who needs us. We are lucky and I know my babies are going to feel more love in their first year than most people get in a lifetime, for that I am thankful.

ONE WORD: MIRACLE!!!!

Okay so here is the deal, we went in for our 12/13 week check up and thank heavens the doctor felt more comfortable looking at heartbeats than hearing them. She said that with twins how could she possibly tell if she was actually hearing two different heartbeats or the same baby's heartbeat? I could have HUGGED her right then!!! I think it was because she has twin girls :)

Oh and the pictures are terrible and I don't even care, I wish you could have been in that room, it was magical. One twin, who we have nicknamed Seabiscuit moved ALL OVER the place, seriously. You could see the baby's arm, then head and then whole body, it was magical. The most important part, you could see the heartbeat, strong and wonderful and perfect.

The other twin, who obviously takes after his/her mother was comfy just laying there and trying to take a nap :). It reminded me so much of Saturday mornings at 7 am when I am willing to go back under the covers and sleep for a couple more hours and Adam is bouncing all over the place trying to get the family up and moving.

I couldn't stop smiling, I still can't stop smiling, I am the luckiest woman on this planet! By the way, because I know my husband won't be reading this blog very often, he hears me talk enough as it is, I'm going to take sometime to thank him. Last night after working an 8 hour day, he made it to the appointment, in perfect time by the way and then went back to work until 10pm that night. I have the hardest working husband on the planet. He thinks carrying two babies is rough, at least I get to hide at home under the big red comfy blankie. Adam I love you and I'm so thankful to have such an amazing husband to share this whole experience with. Please remember this if I say anything rude in the delivery room :).

Telling my brothers, all 3 OF THEM!!!

Kyle gets to go first, he is after all expecting too!!! We wanted to tell all our brothers in person, sorry Jay, so we waited for a trip Kyle planned to tell him...keep in mind he made me wait longer to tell because his brother wanted "the perfect moment." So Adam, Kyle and I were in the living room and he had been at our house for a WEEK already, okay not a week, but it sure felt like 42 days I tell you.

We are all in the living room and I get the signal from Adam, we FINALLY get to tell him. Trust me there were PLENTY of PERFECT opportunities before that, BUT Adam is trying to teach me patience, poor man. SO I head to the bedroom to grab the Hawkeye pacifiers my wonderful husband bought when we first heard we were pregnant.

I say, "Kyle do you want to see what Adam got for me when he went to Iowa City for work a couple weeks ago?" Bless his heart I think he was worried I would come out in some crazy costume of some sort, good thing he didn't faint or vomit or something :). I hand him the pacifiers and again he has this weird, what is she trying to show me look on his poor face. He must think I'm insane...So then we tell him, your baby is going to have a cousin, in June.

Wait for it, but Kyle, your baby is going to have TWO cousins in June. Kyle picks up Adam, they steamroller all over the couch and I think Uncle Kyle is probably still smiling as we speak!!! The he reminds Adam of all THE PERFECT times we could have told him, but didn't. I told you we could have very easily let this secret out MUCH earlier, but Adam wanted to tell his mom first.

JAKE A ROO :)

Now keep in mind, Adam wanted to tell both brothers in person, yet we told Kyle and then we had to WAIT for Jake to get off work. We decide to put the bassinette together and put it right out in the living room so when Jake came over he saw a baby bed in the room first thing...Yes we are an odd family. So Kyle text Jake to make sure he was coming over after work and you could see the proud uncle BEAMING and wanting to tell his brother the good news, but knowing Adam and I would strangle him if he did :)

Jake walks in and I was listening in the back bedroom. I can imagine how this plays out, I'm guessing Jake is wondering why we would put together a gift for Kyle to take to Florida when it would have been a million times easier to just ship it in the box...

That's when Adam said, "It;s my bassinette, not Kyle's." Immediately Jake knows exactly what's going on and he's taking it all in when I sneak in and tell him the kicker. "jake, we actually need TWO bassinettes, TWO cribs and TWO of everything else, we're having TWINS!!! Jake is the kid whisperer, just ask my sister, I'm sure he is more excited about the walking, learning, laughing times of toddlers than the pooping and eating times of newborns, but he will be GREAT. I know it, I've seen him in action.
Oh and one other thing, I have been calling Jake Uncle Jake for as long as I can remember, even to his siblings, sorry Sabrina, I know he's your brother, I just can't help it and Ash I know he's your daddy and not your uncle, but at least with my kids I will get it right :)

JAY or JUSTIN JAMES HOLLAND NORTHRUP

I told my third brother on the phone, I couldn't help it, see poor Adam and his quest to grant me patience. My brother, the brilliant man that he is said, "well every family has one bad apple and since you are having twins, you are guaranteed to like at least one of them." He cracks me up I tell you. I can't wait to see him at Christmas this year, it's been WAY too long.

Telling Aunt Lindsay!!!

Well I need to start this story with one detail, it is absolutely my sister's fault I even wanted children. My sister has the most fantastic children, Tyler who is 7 and Hoken who is 2. It is all fun and games being the aunt and getting to spoil your nephews rotten, then it hits you, you want kids too.

I have made sure to spoil my nephews to the best of my ability because yes they are that great. SO for the story, Lindsay and Sam and Hoken arrived in Lincoln a few hours after I did. I had already told mom and now it's time for Lindsay to know...I had my cute t shirt all prepared and I knew I could talk Hoken into putting on an awesome Hawkeye shirt. We snuck in the bathroom, he let me change his t shirt and I sent him into the kitchen, with mom poised with her camera and me holding my camera.

Lindsay said, "what do you have on, assuming I was just pushing the Hawks on poor Hoken again, thank heavens Lindsay is a University of Iowa graduate or I would have an even more uphill battle. she read the shirt and went, yep Darci is having a baby. I guess mom had told her just that day our sister Darci was having her 4th child. Mom didn't know at the time that we would be having 2 other bundles of joy at the same time, so Lindsay just figured it was for Darci.

Then mom said, "no, not Darci...Lori" so we exchanged the look of shock and of course I was crying in the kitchen and I'm sure all the men were like what is going on? So we get through the story, yes Lindsay your sister is pregnant and you will get to be an aunt in June. Then the kicker, I love telling the kicker, on the bottom of his shirt it says, Coming June 2009 TWICE, WAHOOOOO.

So my sister decides to remind me how huge I will be very soon, yep that's what sister's do :). My favorite part of the story comes the next day, our aunt brought some books for Lindsay to read to Hoken before bed. One of the books is Mommy is Having a Baby. Lindsay read that story to my nephew the night before and of course before nap time on the day of his birthday. We are sitting in the dining room and Lindsay asks her son.."where are aunt Lori's babies?" (keep in mind he is going to be all Big Ten AND a Rhodes Scholar). He goes into the living room, picks up the book and then proceeds to lift my shirt so he can see my belly...this is why I am blessed and why I am having children, he showed me the joy children bring into your life.

I hope I can be half the mother she is.

FIRST GIFT from GRANDMA!!!!

Okay so my mom is just wonderful and she sent this wonderful bassinette last week. Isn't it just the very best!!

I LOVE it and looking at it makes me so excited to meet my babies!!!

I of course had to take the picture next to my tree, I just love holiday lights and wish I could keep mine up all year long. I of course take the tree down on Christmas Day, but for some reason could put it up in September...my poor kids :).

A gIft from my HUBBY!!!

Okay so this is fitting to write about first after the amazing win Saturday, don't worry I have tons of happy news after this weekend, we told our family and I couldn't be MORE THRILLED.

This is the adorable gift Adam brought home yesterday, the color showed up all funky on the second picture, but how cute is the football on the bootie!!!

11 weeks and feeling better?

Okay so I am feeling better lately, you wouldn't know it after yesterday, but that's over too :). My plan is to stay happy and focused and hug the toilet with a big fat smile. I want these babies to be happy and healthy and I need to do whatever I can to make sure that happens.

Mothers have done this before, mothers have done more than this before, mothers have done this an finished their college educations so they can go on to run their own million dollar clinics before...

I ma so lucky, I think that's the part that is hard. Honestly who waits to spend extra time with her husband, decides at 33 she wants children and then is blessed with TWO, yep me. I believe in free will, yet I know my Grandpa Brady and Adam's Grandpa Stephenson and Grandpa Ward had a huge say in this blessing.

I have decided to attach a portion of a paper I wrote about my mother to this posting, it's incredible really and it's all true....

Somewhere between high school and the railroad, my mother got married and had two daughters. She worked extremely hard for the railroad and eventually was promoted to Payroll Supervisor. I can remember her telling me about a colleague, Craig Wentworth. It was 1976 and she started within the same month as Craig. Both only had a high school diploma. The interesting thing to me now is the fact that it didn’t seem to bother my mom to work her 50+ hours a week and see him working less hours and getting more promotions. She didn’t say to herself or her daughters, “Craig just happens to be in the right place at the right time,” or “he knows all the right people, “my mom just kept working.


I can remember numerous weekends spent with my Uncle David while my mom worked, I can remember waiting for 6 o’clock to get here so mom would be there to pick up my sister and I at the daycare. At one point in her career, the railroad was being bought out in Iowa and most people were losing their jobs. The interesting thing to note is Craig was a high level manager by then and he was asked to move his wife and two young children to Chicago, he went. My mom was faced with the same incredible decision. She was single, in her mid to late 20’s and she had two very young daughters. Here she had worked her way up in a company who wanted to move her family to Chicago. I can remember the day she told my sister and me about the opportunity and the simple fact that she was not going to move us to Chicago. She was going to leave her security, paycheck, benefits and seniority for something new.

In the following years I was in middle school, my mom decided instead of living paycheck to paycheck, she would go to school. She had to start at a community college and her first few classes did not even earn her college credit. She took a math class and an English composition class. I look back at the times the three of us would work on homework at the table together, the amazing thing was I was already taking math at the levels she was just now learning. She didn’t blame anyone for her lack of schooling, she didn’t ever mention that she had bad breaks in life and that is why she had to work so hard. She just did the work. .


The people who say there aren’t enough hours in the day should take a page from my mom’s life. There were programs at school my mom missed of both my and my sister’s; the funny thing is I wouldn’t change my childhood for anything. After acquiring her community college degree my mom was accepted at Iowa State University. She drove 50+ miles to and from class everyday. She always took at least 16 hours a semester, including during the summer. I was in high school at the time and I was taking Anatomy, Calculus and Physics, once again I was in classes very similar to my mom’s classes. She stressed education to my sister and I, she always told us “no one can ever take away your education.”


My grandpa Brady was an amazing man who did not ever mince words. He did not say things to say them, he had a purpose and he was always brutally honest. He talked to my mom about becoming a doctor. He told a woman who had no formal education until two years beforehand, to follow her dreams and become the woman she wanted to. Growing up education was not a priority for my mom, getting out of her house and living on her own was a priority. This was one of the first times someone had told her she could actually do it. I look back on my childhood and think about the thousands of times my mom taught us we could be anything, accomplish anything and do whatever we wanted when we grew up. If I would have come in the house and said, “I want to be the CEO for the largest bank in New York,” my mom would have said, “start studying.” If I would have come home and said I want to help children starving in Uganda, my mom would have told me to get all my immunizations in order.


She was proud, passionate, loving and also very loud for a woman of her size. She continued attending Iowa Sate University throughout my high school years, I can remember she graduated with her undergraduate degree, the same year I earned my high school diploma. Then came the remarkable decision, after 7 years of undergraduate school, my mom went to medical school.
My mom went on to excel in medical school and have her two daughters earn their bachelor degrees as well. Keep in mind, her daughters both had college degrees before the age of 25. She has gone from being the first child in her family to have a college degree, to raising two successful daughters and the entire time she was attending college and medical school. My mother’s cause was making sure her daughters had a better life than she did. Fast forward eight years through medical school and residency and finding a job. Her first job out of medical school was for a major medical group in Lincoln, Nebraska.


She spent that first year listening to her patients and helping them, more importantly the leaders of the clinic told her to see more patients per hour. She told us about the conversation, a partner had told her she didn’t need to spend that much time in the exam room and the patients didn’t expect that from doctors. Well this didn’t sit well with her after the blood sweat and tears involved in getting her this far. My mom has always felt that everyone’s time is valuable, sick people spend time waiting for a doctor to even exam them. She didn’t think it was right to have patients wait over 40 minutes to get 5 minutes with the doctor.


Earlier I talked about how mom always said, "no one could take away your education." She completed her contract and when her year was up, she again controlled her fate by opening up her own practice. She was a doctor and she studied too many hours and stayed awake on too many occasions helping people get better for someone to continue to tell her how to do her job. One small detail I will include is, all of her patients switched to her new clinic with her after only knowing her a year, pretty remarkable. The doctors must have been a little wrong about how patients appreciate a doctor who listens to them. I can remember a few years back and my mom was telling me a story about one of the physician's who told her to spend less time with your patients. I guess he had made the comment about her "happy little niche" she had going on in Lincoln. I laughed out loud, I said, "Mom next time he says something like that to you, a woman who turned quality patient care into 10,000 patients and a million dollar building, make sure he gets his story straight. You do not have a little niche, you have a DYNASTY."

In the mean time, my sister went on to medical school as well. My sister has always wanted to be a doctor, in kindergarten she told her teacher she was going to be a pediatrician. Unlike my mom who started later in life, my sister finished undergraduate in four years and is already practicing medicine. My sister’s own Family Medicine Clinic is open, growing and she is not even 30 years old, but she will be soon :).


The first three years of Northrup Internal Medicine, the name of my mom’s clinic, she spent an amazing number of hours working at her clinic and at the hospital. We all pitched in on everything from cleaning, painting and rearranging the furniture. I have never met another human being who could work like her and I know I never will. We have a running joke in our family because my mom is always saying next year will be better, we know better. She can work a 90 hour week and still make time to drive the four hours one way to visit my 2 year old nephew.


She is a force to be reckoned with and she has more drive and determination than any other person on the planet. I figure if she can do all that, I surely can raise two babies with the help of my fantastic family and wonderful friends. I am a very lucky woman, I've had it easy.

Today I feel fantastic, well sort of...

My very best friend and the Godmother to my babies sent me the link to this adorable shirt, see why I love her so very much. I know she will be the best godmother, she is loving, protective, smart, caring and she always knows just what to say. I would die for her, but then she would have to raise twins so I guess I'll stick around and be the needy friend I've always been. She is a newlywed yet she is ALWAYS there for me :). I'm selfish and I miss her, but I know Drew needs his wife too...

Okay so Friday was just plain awful, another vomit-tastic day for me!! I am so excited about being pregnant, yet I am really tired of being so tired and the vomiting can leave any time now...

On a weird note, I have been feeling better for 3 days now, so good I swear my belly is smaller, my face is still chunky but that's because I'm eating for 7 :).

So this is my first pregnancy, do all women go through this panic when they are still early and in between ultrasounds and worried the thing they have all prayed for, then finally received, for some of us double what we wished for, could actually be taken away? Oh my goodness, I'm telling you progesterone is not your friend. It does a number on your hormones and makes your face resemble your junior high school pictures and the things it can do to your mental state, UNREAL.

I am going to stay calm and try and not think about all these crazy thoughts, but boy it's hard some days you know? I have this new fun habit of peeing 4 times every night and waking up at 5 am every morning worried about the future...I know all mom's do that, right?

Okay so instead I will end this post on a happy note, I feel FANTASTIC, scared because I haven't felt this great since August, but wonderful anyway. Just think, most women LOVE being pregnant because they feel this amazing the whole time, yes I officially hate them :)

Mandy JUST FOR YOU

Mandy,

here it is and I want to tell you so bad!!! I can't I have promised Adam that he would be the one to decide when to tell his family, I'm guessing it will be next Saturday, but what do I know.

I'm writing this today because I have wanted to tell you so many times already that we are sisters and we are YES going through this TOGETHER!!! You find out if Kinnick is a boy or a girl tomorrow and I find out in two weeks what the tiny olives in my belly look like again...

I want you to know, we are going through this together and I wish I could have told you sooner, but I made a promise to my husband and we all know how hard it is to keep the good secrets from each other and not them!! Please know that I would have told you the second I peed on a stick, but we decided to have this special secret between the two of us.

The great news, Kinnick is going to have 2 cousins to play with in June, even though everyone is saying it will probably be May because it's TWINS?!?!?!?!? Of course we would go through this together, who else could be as close as we are and live thousands of miles APART.

Telling my mom....

Okay so this past weekend I got to tell my family and I'm telling you, that is the hardest secret to keep from your mom and your sister especially when you are vomiting daily. I was on my way to Lincoln, my nephew's shirt safely tucked in my bag and my nerves of steal causing me to pop TUMS like they are candy.

I am getting off the Waverly Nebraska exit and all of the sudden floods of tears come streaming down my face, I'm about to tell my mother she's going to be a grandmother, again. Boy does my mom LOVE being a grandmother, she was born to do it I tell you. For a woman who spent her young adult life raising two daughters, she's got the grandma thing down.

I can remember numerous road trips the three of us took and mom spent her time telling my sister and I about all the sexually transmitted diseases and all the garbage that happens once you start having sex. She used to say, "herpes is for life, just remember that and BE SAFE." She also put the fertile fear of God in my head, I was sure I would have 7 kids because I deserved punishment for breaking her heart so many times. Don't get me wrong, my mom knew we would find amazing husbands she just wanted us to find them at 25 instead of 15.

Here it is 2008 both of her daughters have college educations and husband's that love them unconditionally. I am going to take this minute to say I love my husband with all my heart. He is my best friend, he makes me laugh and he doesn't let me get away with any of the crap I like to pull. He is patient and calm and I have no idea how he puts up with me daily. Again, back to the trip...

So I get to my mom's house and it's her and I. I figure this is my chance, so she says, "Oh let me get in the shower I have been working on charts all morning." I tell her, "wait I want to show you the gift I made for Hoken..." so I go and get it. My mom reads the shirt and says, oh it's cute Lori. I tell her to read it one more time, then I see the look...

You? She says, me I tell her. Then I point out the VERY BEST PART, twice it says :)She is speechless and we are crying and this is everything I imagined it would be. Oh geez now we have to go to Target, the store and find baby things before Lindsay and the boys get there...

Here is the best part, my mom was randomly telling strangers in Lincoln, NE she is about to be the grandmother to twins. We are standing in line at Target getting ready to pay for our things, including my very first maternity tops and she tells the poor woman standing behind us in line. The woman smiles so big and says, "well I am a mother to twins a boy and a girl. Just so you know everyone says it's the hardest thing to do have two newborns at once. What they don't know, it's magical and you are one of the luckiest women on earth. I wouldn't do it any other way, my twins are 7 now and I thank heaven for them everyday." she was fantastic and I think you could see my smile all the way the way in Iowa that night.

We run to our first Hy Vee visit and the sweet girls are scanning our groceries and putting them in the eco-friendly green bags that are just fantastic. The checkout girl looks at the two of us and says,"are you guys sisters?" I have to tell you, it's a much bigger compliment to me than to my mother who is STUNNING without even trying. So I have to say someone can ask me that every day of my life and I would be perfectly okay with it, especially being nauseous and having excess progesterone flowing through my body....

We continue on to Hy-Vee and my mom again is telling the poor teenager scanning our groceries...I'm going to be a grandmother to twins!!! The poor guy says, "well hope for two boys or two girls, I'm a twin and I have a sister and it stinks!!" He was adorable, I'm guessing he wanted a brother, but he was so cute anyway. Either way, two people we talked to both had twins and both had a boy and a girl, hmm? I don't care either way, I get TWO BABIES!!!

Okay I will write about telling my sister in a bit, that one will get me all emotional and I can't have that right now :)

October 30, 2008 Ultrasound

Okay so the morning of October 28th and 29th I woke up having the strangest dreams imaginable, I dreamt I was having twins...Not too worry my godmother to be sent me an email explaining the dream.

Twins If your dream entails giving birth to twins, or if you are dreaming about baby twins, please see " birth ". Twins in astrology represent opposites, and we may use this symbolism to explain our dream. The twins could suggest a duality in thoughts, ideas, feelings, or states of consciousness. The details of the dream will give you a clue to whether or not these varying aspects are in harmony or in conflict with each other. The twins could also represent the balance that is extremely important to our emotional and psychological health. Old dream interpretation books say that dreaming about adult twins foretells of "double trouble followed by double joy."

So not too fear, I go on with my day and get excited about my 2:00 appointment. I need to leave work early and make sure and fill out all the paperwork before the appointment. I arrive at the clinic ahead of schedule and check in. The desk has this electronic sign in deal. Seriously gone are the days of sheets of paper and photocopying your insurance card. Now we get to play with what I can only compare to a PSP, a gaming device I am lousy with. I still call Xbox Nintendo and I loved Frogger, Dig Dug and Pole Position when I was growing up. I'm lousy with the gaming these days although Guitar Hero does look like  a BLAST!!!

Back to my story, so I get through the Jetson-esque sign in and wait. Keep in mind I have read that I'm supposed to have a full bladder so they can do a urine test and the ultrasound is clearer if you are full of water. I think it's more effective when you are are farther along in your pregnancy but I'm not taking any chances.

We finally get in the room and the nurse gives me a gown the size of a paper towel, yes next time I will be asking for the bounty select a size gown so I can cover my growing ba dunk a dunk. She also says I can keep my socks on, well yea. SO I am sitting on the exam table and my very adorable husband says, "honey why don't you put your feet in the stirrups now so you are comfortable?" Really honey? Men have no idea the amount of anxiety stirrups cause...he's cute though he honestly thought I would feel better with my feet apart and all my glory hanging out with us.

When you are sitting with your husband about to see your first child time takes forever...I try and make a joke, "Honey what if he tells us we are having twins..." Adam tells me to relax and enjoy the idea of having one baby and being thrilled about the entire experience... The doctor and nurse finally come in and start the exam, enough about that. Let's get to the ultrasound and the AMAZING effect of seeing your baby for the first time. I am sitting on the bed so I get a tiny screen that seems to be showing a baby going black for a second and showing the baby again.

After what seemed like forever the doctor begins explaining what we are seeing. He talks about the baby and how everything is growing just as it should be, he takes the necessary measurements so we have a more exact date for our baby's birth and then he keeps talking...
"Notice this growing baby, then I'm going to move to this side and show you your other growing baby..." HOLY CRAP.

We do not have a history of twins, we do not know very many twins, we are having twins. It's an absolute miracle and I still don't think I understand the magnitude of being blessed with TWO BABIES at one time. I am the luckiest woman on the planet.

Here is the shirt I made my nephew for this weekend. He looked adorable and let me put it on him immediately!! He's a HAWK FAN, what can I say :)

The WEEK of October 14th

So here it was, I was going to check to see if we finally made a BABY. I came home from work and Adam was headed to Monday Night Football, I made him wait of course.

I peed on the dreaded stick, which before now I had done twice before years earlier when my period was late and Adam and I weren't planning a baby but I figured I would check even though they were both false alarms.

Back to the story, you see I didn't want to risk any chance of harming a possible baby by continuing with my bad habits so I figured I would pee on the stick and see what happened. Well this time the stick had two blue lines almost immediately!!! I showed my husband and he said, "go to the doctor and make sure." I set up an appointment that very next morning for 11:30 a.m. with my family practice doctor. Well you go to the doctor, you wait in the waiting room, you wait in the exam room and you pee in a cup.

Trust me, waiting to find out if your pregnant is a hundred times worse than waiting for your antibiotics. Okay it totally isn't but it certainly felt like hours to find out. I even asked the nurse to see if she could find out before the doctor came in the room, she was so sweet she went directly to the lab for me.

Long story short, yep I'm pregnant now what??????????????????

What am I going to do?

So this past weekend I told my side of the family, they were thrilled and shocked. My sister Darcy is also expecting so the shirt I put on my nephew didn't work quite as well as I had planned...

The more we talked about the excitement of having twins, the more panicked I became. I thought of double feedings, double diapers, double college and double love I forgot about double cribs, double strollers, and double nursery in our small apartment. As my brother in law asked me if I would chose a double stroller with one baby in front and one baby always behind or a side by side stroller I realized, I have no idea....

Seriously you spend 32 years of your life wanting a career and a good marriage and then BAM your nephew comes along and you realize, everyone was right, I want a child...so you talk with your husband who for 11 years has heard no honey we don't want to have children, we want to be the aunt and uncle, yes honey I want children. He is a caring and understanding man and after some thought and months of discussions, finally, you both decide to try and have a baby.

Then comes the months of not getting pregnant. Is it me, is it him, what am I doing wrong. I wasn't going to be that wife who schedules when the couple has "playtime" and I wasn't going to be the wife who takes my temperature every day. I figured I would be a good wife and have sex every day or every other day, okay that was for me too :). Then I get frustrated every time it doesn't happen and I don't really want to cry on my husband's shoulder because he is going to get enough tears when the baby does get here, you know?

So I call on my number one, my best friend, my queen of the world, sports goddess who by the way is planning her wedding at the time and still makes time to listen to me cry because my cramps are so bad I am pretty sure God is pulling my uterus out Himself. She tells me I'm not old, she tells me it takes time to make a baby, she keeps me happy with "last hurrahs" and thoughts of another football game including beers :). She is my rock and this whole time she is planning her wedding!

Oh and don't forget, she is the only person on the planet who knows all of this. My husband knows, but let's face it, he's a man and does he really care, nope :). So then I am at my very best friend's wedding and I am watching her marry her best friend. I get to thinking as she hugs her family and friend's I am feeling very tired and very emotional, I don't remember being that overwhelmed at my own wedding, but all her family is now my family and all her friends are of course my friends. Maybe I just need a day to rest.

The next day I rest, okay I sleep the entire day away. I haven't slept an entire day away in forever, I figure it was all the excitement of the wedding and the rehearsal, right? WRONG. So I spend the next week as tired as I was that Sunday, now something isn't right. I start researching the internet because that's what we all do when things aren't quite how they should be. I read about something called implantation bleeding and wonder, could it be?