Grandpa Scholl

So this morning I got some awful news. My grandfather from Mason City passed away.  My dilemma is this, what do you do when someone passes away who you haven't seen or even communicated with in over 15 years?  When my sister and I were little I think we spent at least 3 days a week at my grandparents.

I can remember grandpa popping out his teeth and scaring my little sister, the hours and hours he spent teaching both of us cribbage and the fact that we always had a place to sit, right on his lap!! He taught me the joys of homemade salsa, the amazing taste of filet's in his garage brick oven and let us play house in his camper all summer long. We jumped of his front porch over the big bush and ran around the house because he told us that was a game?

There were Saturday cookouts with the garage smoker going and snapping turtles in big old barrels, yep they cooked them.  We played on the old, but wonderful swing set, it had a climbing rope a swing which we would twist all up and sit in so it could spin out and an old teeter totter that probably should have busted every time we sat on it.  They had apple trees and I swear a green apple off that tree was the best summer sour treat ever!!

I can't forget to mention the growth wall, they had EVERYONE on this wall and it was so fun to mark how tall you were!!! Of course I can't mention the growth wall and not mention the black ca clock and semi-truck cribbage board.  My grandpa loved us, every Saturday night we would watch the Mandrel sisters and Dukes of Hazard while we sat in the carpet covered roller thingies...on Christmas we all had a stocking on the freezing door to the back room.  Even my Aunt Kelly's dogs had a stocking. The back room had a pool table, but they didn't ever heat that room, so even the outside of the door was cold. I can remember playing Barbies and games and they even had miniature horses for our Barbies to ride.

Grandma always had candies for us and so many hugs, she would cry when we left and never quite understood why. I think now I totally get it, but it has probably taken this long for me to be able to step back and realize what she knew was going on, even then.  

He passed away his morning and I am really torn about what to do.  So instead of trying to figure it out, I decided to write on my blog and go from there. Thanks for listening...

Lloyd Scholl, rest in peace 

Names??

Oh where do I start...my husband and I have gone through some interesting things with this pregnancy....job loss, panic because we have to monitor our girls so closely, another job loss, oh and my daily whining.  The one thing that may send us into fighting happens to be naming our girls. I'm kidding, this pregnancy has seriously brought us so close together, we worry about our girls and it seems like us versus whatever challenge comes up that day you know.

It is a wonderful thing to be married to your best friend and know that the entire time your hormones are sending your brain into uncharted waters and your belly into a different zip code, someone is there, in your corner, fighting right along side of you. Oh wait I was talking about names, I get all kinds of lovey when I'm talking about Adam lately, sorry about that.

So names, I LOVE Kate, I LOVE Hayden (Adam doesn't like Hayden for a girl, how can I change his mind?) We both like Ruby and we would like to have Grace for a middle name. I was stuck on Grace and Kate for our girls for so long, but Adam wants to keep looking.  I have been loving Elizabeth lately, but Adam disagrees.  The pressure is in the fact that what we decide is what these girls will be called for their ENTIRE LIVES.

 Okay really no matter what we choose everyone is going to say we did a great job, they have to they love us right? I just want to make sure I pick something that grows with my girls.  So for today I guess I'm on Kate Marie and Ruby Grace, BUT for anyone who knows me, I will change my mind by tomorrow?  I also thought about Kate Northrup because I love my stepfather so very much and would just like to let him know how thankful I am he's been such a big part of my life you know?

Oh don't let me forget, I really like Kate Colby Ward but again, Adam didn't like it. He does likeHaley Grace, but now Haley sounds too common I'm so weird, I need help right? Why couldn't we compromise and he like could like Hayden Grace? See close to Haley and I get my way :) Thank goodness he doesn't read this blog or I would be in big trouble I bet.

The simple fact is this, for now Baby A and Baby B are growing, causing my organs to feel HUGE and squished at the same time and that's all that matters? Who knew that an unemployed pregnant woman would forget all the money stresses and backaches and nausea when she found out her daughters are growing at the same rate?!?!?!!

Wow, this motherhood thing is going to be a wild ride...

Updates for a Mom to BE (Yes Mandy, You!!)

Okay so everything is going splendidly, not really but the girls are growing and you know nothing else matters, I mean NOTHING...

At the last appointment last week we found out our girls grew 10 ounces a piece in TWO WEEKS!! which means yes, one is 1 pound 10 ounces and the other is 1 pound 11 ounces. This is amazing news on so many levels...it means no one is hogging the placenta and no one is gaining faster than her sister...

Here's the miracle, I feel 42 months pregnant, one of my girls seems to be resting on my sciatic nerve and her sister is doing the best job she can making sure I feel nauseous, BUT they are growing so I could really care less?? I guess this is why a woman goes through 40 weeks of pregnancy, you quickly learn that all new things matter. No longer will my birthdays matter, no longer will a bad hair day phase me in the slightest...okay some of you know bad hair days have never bothered me before or I would have fixed my hair more :).

The only thing that matters is taking care of these two little miracles God has chosen me to raise. How did I get so lucky, I honestly have no idea. My family is amazing, first and foremost my wonderful husband knows how special a cupcake or 3 makes a Tuesday night oh and don't let me forget the "Goose Fabra," or whatever they say on Anger Management to calm down the crazy pregnant woman when she is worried about her unemployment, weight or fact that she hasn't completed the nursery yet?  

The rest of my family has also been tremendous, mom brought me back from breakdown last week, my sister reminds me that my problems are nothing compared to having your BMW break down (just kidding Lindsay but you have this great way of reminding me that everything works out and I need to chill...) oh and then there are the family members in Florida who even though they have had the WORST MONTH ever, are always worried about me? Who does all that, right my family, I'm SO LUCKY!!!

I am a terrible blogger I've decided, I'm going to get better...yep I'm pretty sure I've said that a few thousand times before, I really mean it this time.

Oh and maybe I will get crazy with the cheese whiz and post a belly picture or two, it's seriously an ever growing planet of it's own lately. I love it when I am able to breath and sleep, okay I love it always, my girls are in there!!

Lonely?

Okay so here's my question...as a pregnant woman carrying two human beings inside of yourself, how does it happen?

There are times I think about what's going on and wonder, am I the most selfish friend on the planet? Why does your life change so dramatically BEFORE your babies get here? I can't even tell you the last time I went out, the bad part I didn't go out very often when I wasn't pregnant and now it seems worse.  I thought I was a "homebody" before I peed on a stick, yep I guess I'm in hibernation now then....

Then I think about after the girls get here, will I be TOTALLY worthless to my friends unless they want yet another story about how cute my daughters are? Wow hormones RULE!!!!

GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS

Okay so here are some baby pictures!!! i can't even believe we have TWO little ones in there, I also can't believe we know they are girls and I haven't posted that yet. SO much has happened in the last month or so. We found out we are having two lovely daughters and we found out we are having two identical daughters, one in a million I tell you.

I am the luckiest woman ever!! My girls are so healthy, we did find out that they share a placenta.  As I have now learned, this means I will be going to the OB Gyn every two weeks until I deliver, which will be 35 weeks and for the last two weeks I will wear a monitor 24/7. This whole thing sends a pregnant woman into a tail spin I tell you. First you think everything is wonderful and you have to worry about double everything, well guess what ALL that goes out the window when you realize something could very easily happen.

Our doctor is amazing and so incredibly qualified and talented and AWARE, she took all the time we needed and explained everything to us. She will also personally schedule every single appointment until I deliver.  As Grandma Ruby says, "she better understand the precious cargo she is protecting, those are MY grand babies in there," the best part is she does get it.  She is going to monitor my babies and make sure they are growing like they should be.  The babies will have to come out early because after 35 weeks the stronger of the two twins will start to take more than her share of the nutrients of the placenta. She even went as far as to explain the fact that one daughter is on the edge of the placenta and if she was more in the middle the risk wouldn't be as high.

This is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with, I guess Someone is preparing me fr motherhood. Nothing else matters, only the health of these two miracles matter to me. I will eat fruits and vegetables and drink water by the gallon if it means my girls will be okay. SO far I have been told to increase protein and continue to drink lots and lots of water, but if the doctor told me to do jumping jacks every night and sing the Star Spangled Banner while balancing a spoon on my nose you can bet your butt I would be jumping right now....

The AMAZING Molly Jean

Okay so let me start with my little, here's to the woman who is the godmother of my babies story. I have touched on some of her remarkable characteristics once or twice, but this post is all for her.

Molly is one of those women who works her tail off, makes all her friends feel special and then for those of us who let her totally in, she changes your world. I am sitting here right now thinking of my life 5 short years ago, yes I knew my husband and I knew my family and I was happy. Now I look at all I have and I just want to cry, okay let me be honest, I do cry. How is it that I have all these people who I love and who love me back? Okay back to Miss Molly...

She has taught me that it's okay to have someone to vent to, daily, hourly, whenever you need it and to be that person to your friend in return. Before Molly Jean, I thought it was normal for a person to keep all your dark secrets and all your crying for your spouse? Man was I wrong, if you get the wonderful opportunity to have a friend who listen to you unconditionally and then not kill your husband even though he was pretty stupid that day or tell you to leave him, you are a lucky woman.

Oh don't let me forget, Molly also taught me to stick up for me once in a while, who knew? Don't get me wrong, I'm selfish and think about myself way too much, but in certain situations you need to listen to your heart and go with "what YOU want." Okay so back to her, she works 6 days a week, and still finds time to listen to me complain. Her husband is going to kill me if I don't start only talking about "great pregnancy things" otherwise she will be waiting even longer to have a few of her own...he will be thrilled to know, yep week 14.5 RULES and now that I have energy again, I will make sure and tell Molly all about the good pregnancy things too.

She will be this mom who invites her son/daughter's entire class over after school for snacks and games, and the kids will want to go. Her children will be smart, gorgeous and will treat each and every human being with the utmost respect. She is going to go to every basketball game, ballet, musical, & math competition. Her children will not hide their faces when their mom walks in, but run up and hug her because they knew she would be there, Molly is always there when you need her. Not too mention, she is a stunning woman and who wouldn't be proud to have her walk in to see you...

I would give this woman the world, the funny thing is, she never asks for anything. My wish is for everyone to be lucky enough to have a person in their life like I do, Molly is one of a kind and I hope she has a small idea of how much she means to me.

Freezing in Iowa....

So it's freezing and icy and to all who know me, I suck in bad weather any way....So I decided to work from home today. This brings up an interesting story for me, why is my boss laying me off now? It's strange how you can do all the crap work for 3 years and have no problems. No problems making coffee, running errands, doing all these things you would have thought your college degree made you exempt from and then when you need a little loyalty back, TA DA you get laid off.

Here's the weirdest part, I'm going to be okay, my babies are going to be okay and yes even though he is working 60 hours a week in case, my husband is going to be okay. I just want to scream and yell and stand up for myself and instead, I will move on. I have babies now, who needs a crappy job? Okay I need a crappy job, I need to buy diapers and cribs and clothes and well I'm sure grandma and family will cover toys :), but you get what I'm saying.

I will look for a job and that is that, great timing boss man, I'm so glad I respected you enough to tell you before I told my family and respected you enough to give you a head's up so you could let me go.

Enough about that, let's talk about the blessing that I have been given. Here I am 34 years old and about to have TWO babies, seriously. How in the world did I get to be the luckiest woman on the planet? I have an amazing husband who let's me put my cold feet on him and now we are having two little miracles!!! I can't stop smiling now that I'm not sick everyday. I have a very best friend who has been so supportive and my rock as always, a twin of my own (Gemini Mandy Belly) who is going through this whole thing with me in warmer weather, even though she is 8 weeks ahead and she didn't get morning sickness :).  We have even more amazing friends who will find out Friday that we are expecting and it's been all I can do to keep this fantastic secret!!!! Thank goodness my husband is a rock, I would have told them all way before now :)

Oh and I want to thank my family for letting me call them and freak out about silly things so they can tell me for the first time, "you are normal." I love them and I am so thankful, especially now when people are complaining about the holidays and the stresses of seeing everyone and surviving, I am thankful. We are a crazy fun family who would drop everything and get to the person who needs us. We are lucky and I know my babies are going to feel more love in their first year than most people get in a lifetime, for that I am thankful.